Dumb dogs!
by LittlePiecesOfMagic
Summary: One- shot. Finn and Rachel own two dogs. Rachel just happens to absolutely adore them but Finn is nearly 100% sure they are out to get him. Broadway!Rachel and Writer!Finn.


**Just one little idea I had in my head. Enjoy!**

**I do not own Glee nor do I claim to.**

* * *

"Oh Lord, shut the fuck up!" Finn yelled out the window.

Rachel gasped in horror. She slapped Finn on the arm before shaking her head. "They're dogs, Finn. They bark."

"No, Rachel. No. No dogs bark as much as those two do! It's insane! I've already walked them twice today and we have fed them! What more do they want?!"

Rachel smiled in amusement before continuing to wash the dishes. She glanced at the clock before gasping in horror at the time.

"Shit! I have to get going. I can't be late tonight or Tony will kill me! This show is one of the most important as he has certain people coming to watch it. I'll see you later!" She dried her hands, grabbed her purse and coat before giving Finn as kiss. She smiled before leaving the house. Finn sighed happily. The dogs had stopped barking.

He hummed a tune as he made himself a grilled cheese sandwich. He poured a glass of milk before placing the sandwich and glass on the table. He pulled back the chair before sitting down and opening his laptop. He smiled contently at the silence as he began to type. He was half way done with this piece and was quite proud of it. He picked his glass of milk up and took a drink. Suddenly, the dogs began to bark. Loudly. Finn jumped in fright, spilling his milk all over his laptop. The screen turned fuzzy before it went black.

Finn's mouth opened wide in horror. "Are you fucking kidding me?!"

* * *

"I can't believe she is making me walk these two again! She is lucky I haven't killed them yet!" Finn muttered under his breath as he walked the dogs through the park. He groaned as Toby, one of the dogs, stopped to sniff yet another tree.

"Seriously, Toby? That's the seventh one you have sniffed! If you're gonna pee, do it already!"

Toby looked up at him, as though he had understood exactly what Finn had said. He shook his tail before continuing to walk. Finn sighed in disbelief. He glanced at the other dog, a girl, Penney. She was...ok. She just walked and never caused a fuss. But she had the most annoying bark out of the both of them. It was like a screech that never stopped.

Suddenly, an old woman stopped him. "Oh my, what lovely dogs you have!" She stopped at knelt down to pet them. Finn stood awkwardly with a small smile on his face. Toby and Penney licked the woman's hand, acting like two innocent angels. Finn glared daggers at them. Finn tried to tug Toby back a bit, knowing that when Toby got rubbed for a while, he tended to get hyper and jump on you.

He pulled Toby back but he wouldn't budge. Finn groaned. Dumb dog. Finn cringed when he seen Toby's tail move faster.

"Shit," he muttered under his breath.

Finn's eyes widened in horror as Toby jumped on to the poor woman, sending her falling backwards and on to her butt.

"Owww!" she yelled in pain.

"Well, fuck." Finn groaned.

* * *

"Rachel, I am begging you! Please can we just give them away!"

Rachel shook her head. "No, Finn. And that is that!"

Rachel left the living room and waltzed into the kitchen. Finn followed. He passed Toby and Penney who were let inside and he sent them a glare. Dumb dogs.

He sat on the chair as Rachel continued to cook dinner. After about twenty minutes, they moved to the table and began to eat Rachel's special lasagne.

"Wow, babe! This is so good!" he gargled as he put another forkful into his mouth.

Rachel giggled and a blush crept upon her cheeks. She began to eat to. They talked about Rachel's show and Finn's new book. Finn stopped talking mid-sentence when he seen Toby and Penney staring at him from the corner with their big brown eyes. Finn shifted uncomfortably.

"Rach, can we put the dogs back outside when we're eating?"

"Finn! It's raining outside, they're fine in here."

Finn groaned before giving up. He knew to never fight against his wife's wishes. He glanced at the dogs again who seemed to have both moved closer. Finn ignored this thought and continued to eat.

Suddenly, Finn felt a tug at his jeans and looked down to see Penney pulling at them.

"Hey, girl. Shoo away, I'm trying to eat." he patted Penney on her back.

Penney didn't give up, continuing to tug. Finn groaned as he gently tried to shoo Penney off. Just then, Finn heard a clatter of a plate hit the ground as Penney stopped tugging. Rachel began to laugh loudly as Finn turned to see Penney and Toby eating his lasagne from the floor. That must have been their plan, the little devils. Penney distract while Toby goes in for the kill. Dumb dogs.

* * *

Finn placed a pillow over his ears. They were barking and it was four a.m! He glanced at Rachel who was sound asleep. The dogs seemed to quiet down as Finn smiled and shut his eyes. They shot back open when the dogs barked yet again. He groaned. He got up from the bed and banged on the window. The dogs hushed down and Finn sighed in relief and climbed into bed.

Finn's eyes shot open in anger as the barking started up again. 6 a.m and he had barely got a wink of sleep. He looked at his wife who was snoring lightly. Heavy sleeper. He knocked on the window again but they didn't shut up. Finn grew tired of this. The dogs got fed, walked and played with but they just wouldn't stop fucking barking. He glanced at his wife before leaving the room and going downstairs. He walked out of the front of the house and quietly opened the wooden gate that kept the dogs inside. He smirked evilly before going back inside and waiting for the dogs to realise the gate was open.

Finn woke up to see a frantic Rachel rushing around the room.

"Finn!" she said with teary eyes, "The dogs! They're gone! The gate is opened so they must have gotten out!"

Finn tried to hide his victory smile as he wrapped his arms around his wife. She cried into his chest as Finn smiled secretly. Suddenly, a knock pulled them away. Rachel wiped her eyes before leaving the room to answer the door. When Finn was sure she was gone, he threw his hands into the air and danced in victory. He was free of two annoying dogs and everything was right in the world.

Finn's happiness fell sort when Rachel came rushing into the room telling him that a neighbour found the dogs and brought them back. She laughed in delight. Finn felt the need to cry as two dogs jumped on to his bed and began to lick his face.

"You have got to be fucking kidding me! Dumb dogs."

* * *

**It's sort but it's a little idea that has been swimming around my head for a while now. The funny thing is is that it is based on a true story! My two dogs, Toby and Penny, are my inspiration for this story. Right now, as I write this, they are barking loudly and annoyingly. Dumb dogs!**


End file.
